Obedience in three parts

Obedience is a lifelong skill. Our children must learn early on to obey mommy and daddy. This is for their protection, their safety, and their well-being. But ultimately it is to train them to obey God’s authority in their lives.

Along the way they will have to obey employers, teachers, police officers, pastors, and other authority figures. The training for this lifelong obedience begins at home.

Awhile ago we adopted a little phrase to teach our children about the kind of obedience that we expect. We expect obedience to be…

ALL the way. RIGHT away. With a HAPPY heart.

After all, it isn’t really obedience when you stomp about with a scowl on your face. At least it isn’t in my book. The phrase was given to me by a wise friend and also based on the book, “Don’t Make me Count to Three.” (a book I enjoyed immensely)

Recently, a dear friend of mine blogged about her disdain for the phrase I use in my house. She can’t stand the last part about a “happy heart” because sometimes we aren’t “happy” at all with what we have to do. Her explanation is written out on her blog and you can go read it.

Now, I LOVE a good discussion on this kind of stuff, so I was glad she took the other side and offered her thoughts. At this point, it was time for me to mull it over and take it to God in prayer. Because I saw her point. I have often told my children that they don’t have to “feel” happy about it, but they must respond in an appropriate manner, best described at the time with “happy heart”.

My friend, Rebecca, has had a decade of difficulties beyond any I can imagine. She has had to obey the authority and will for God in her life in areas that she is FAR from “happy” about. She has lost a parent, moved to the other side of the world and had to move back, and endured health issues beyond any that I can imagine so that she could have children.

The word phrase “happy heart” grates on her nerves and gets under her skin in a way that I can’t imagine. And rightfully so. I admit that in the big picture, I have been blessed with a fairly “happy” life to live in obedience.

So when she speaks. I listen.

I didn’t want to write this off as “semantics”. There is a deep theology attached to this phrase that I want my children to learn for life. THIS is how I want them to obey God. Immediately my husband and I had a discussion about it. Then I took some time to prayerfully consider her point and my words.

And God spoke. Three days later, I asked my daughter (K) to begin her schoolwork. She did so immediately. (which isn’t typical) I thanked her for her obedience to my request and she told me, “But I am still not happy about it.” I let her know that she didn’t have to be, but she did the right thing by trusting mommy’s authority and obeying me.

Then and there God laid a word on my heart that was to replace a “happy heart”!

HUMBLE.

We obey ALL the way. RIGHT away. With a HUMBLE heart.

Because we humbly submit to the authority of God. We willingly put our own desires aside and recognize His (and right now, mommy’s) authority in our lives and we follow. We willfully subject ourselves to His authority, knowing that His plan is best whether it “feels happy” or not. We can cry out to Him, petition and plea, but ultimately we humbly submit.

(we have taught our children an appropriate manner to make a “wise appeal”, so they know how to petition for a change AND how to accept the ultimate answer…another life skill, but a post for another day)

K (age 7) and I immediately discussed the change in wording. We agreed to talk about obedience with a humble heart from here on out. I think that ultimately it expresses to her heart and soul what I want her to learn for LIFE.

And the new phrase is Rebecca approved. *wink